Its like a Rule – You won’t get out of a unwanted situation unless you stop grumbling about it. The more you nit-pick about it, the more deep u go inside the sh*t, and the day you stop complaining, the unexpected happens and you jump out of it effortlessly.
That’s life, and that’s exactly my experience. Most of my friends are aware how much I detested and groused about being a “house-wife”. I don’t believe in designations and the term “home-maker” never made any difference to how pathetic I considered my state of being & my role in the family & society. My self-respect was running far –away from me and I felt like an insane, or rather I would say useless person, who isn’t capable of earning. More so than the earning part, it was the [mental]activity, or rather the lack of it, that was forcing me dull all the while. I was behaving miserably and sometimes pined for other’s sympathy. While on other days, if someone showed me any kind of sympathy, it raged me all the more. Ironic, isn’t it!
And just a few months ago, Thanks to a “series of” good [read motivating] lectures from my husband, I pulled up and that’s when I started writing here. I felt needed, I felt am working for someone who would be reading my blog and it gave me a great kick when encouraging comments came from all over the circle[My heartfelt thanks to all those people, who spoke to me in person, commented on the posts, liked on FB, mailed me or texted me to praise my posts, Every single word was a booster to me]. That’s about time when I wrote R u still looking for a job?? ,that I jumped out of the terrible self-degrading situation. I started living and realized the Blessing in Disguise, that I had simply ignored all those months. I was loving this new me and my new outlook towards life, living my new found happiness every moment, Doing all I had always wanted to do had I had the time!
And then one fine day, this new positive Reema gets a call, Unexpected & Out of nowhere, an interview call !! for Christ’s sake! [I confess I did not get a single one during all those self-pitied months though I had applied to countless portals, was I that bad or just the vibes my words sent…]. Within a few days of interview, I get an acceptance call and Voila!!, am all set to join back work now, starting next week!
So what it is that I am feeling, new job blues or Old Job Greens!Am as nervous as a fresh-out-of-college-joining-first-ever-job, as excited as a lateral joining his field of interest, & frankly, as relieved as someone returning home after a long rough journey!! I hadn’t written for a long long time now, But I simply owed one to this space on my last “free” day. I want to live my life today! and then stand up & gear up,once again, for being a juggler, my live balls being – motherhood, married life, work, household and social responsibilities….and I so wish to add here, blogging. I wish!